To the Delight of Enemies All

So what if the economy is tanking, unemployment is skyrocketing, an ice storm lowered the boom on New England and the experts have concluded that the federal bailout did a belly flop? Christmas will arrive, just a bit late this year.

So don’t worry if the governor of Illinois decides to sell a Senate seat to cushion his retirement nest. Be hopeful! The Big Three and many blue states are courting the big spenders in Congress. Watch them smile without fear, for they know Christmas begins early next year.

And share the love! Don’t be sad because OPEC jacked up the tab. Besides, who needs oil and coal when we’ve been promised windmills and sunshine? Ask any polar bear. Industry, transportation, stoves and air-conditioning are overrated. If animals can do without, why should 300 million Americans pout?

And have some faith in government. Certainly a little conversation will end the countdown to an Israeli/Iranian showdown, Russia’s belligerence and the growing evidence of a major cyber attack. Show some Christmas spirit. Admit to the world that all the Muslim jihadists need is a little love, appreciation and the extinction of Christianity.

Granted, the foreclosure rate of US homes is climbing. And no one needs to be reminded that the stock market is competing with de-escalating home values to destroy the net worth of Americans. But don’t fret for a second! Just tighten your night caps and let visions of pork dance through your head.

To the nation’s delight, here comes eight tiny reindeer, Barney Frank, Chris Dodd, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Chuck Schumer, John Kerry, Ed Kennedy and Charlie Rangel by name. They are joyful for the chance to pull Santa Obama’s red sleigh, loaded with goodies and deficits so high they’ll blanket the sky.

The trial attorneys, lobbyists, teachers, bureaucrats, illegal aliens and welfare recipients all, have hung up their stockings, knowing St. Obama will fill them with stuff only found in reindeer stalls.

Compassionate Conservatives should be happy as well, for President Bush will not disappear. Expect to hear his name spoken time and again, for St. Obama will remind us that his nose was blue and not a pretty bright red like his sled.

We can trust the new leadership coming to town. Obama, Michelle and their eight tiny reindeer realize Bush is responsible for world poverty, 9/11, terrorism, Christianity, weather changes and pollution, the energy crisis, the financial meltdown, low taxes, too little government regulation and the world’s failure to love us.

St. Obama will go right to work. All will be well when capitalism settles down for a long winter’s nap. In the wink of an eye, more government, more regulation, more taxation, more apologies and more freeloaders will arrive to the delight of our enemies all.

So pardon the effrontery for questioning if Obama was born in this country . . . .

Personalize the Federal Bailout

Think of the bailout in personal terms. Currently there are about 113 million households in the United States. The aggregate cost of the bailout, including payments made, pending and proposed tops $2 trillion.

Using simple arithmetic, the federal government could use these funds to send every household in the nation a check for $17,000. Or, it could elect to mail a check in the amount of $6500 to every US citizen.

This begs five questions. First and foremost! Would you and your family benefit more from an infusion of $17,000 into your checking account, or from bailing out the Wall Street financial fraternity and a select group of mismanaged companies?

Secondly, which alternative would have the greatest immediate impact on stimulating the economy?

Thirdly, which option would most rapidly reduce unemployment?

Fourthly, which alternative would save the most homes from foreclosure, increase home values and stimulate new construction?

Finally, which choice would stabilize the stock market and increase the value of every family’s portfolio?

The answer to all five questions is painfully obvious.

It’s impossible not to believe that 99% of the US manufacturers and retailers, including the Big Three automakers, would see a mighty jump in sales if the funds were given to households. The only bad news for the American consumers is that they would see fewer products “on sale.”

Keep in mind that the US taxpayers will be stuck with the identical sized debt with either option. For the fiscally conservative, there could be a third choice. Let them have a credit of $17,000 toward future taxes.

Or, for the fiscally wise, eliminate the bailout and reduce the projected deficit by $2 trillion, and spare them, their children and grandchildren from taxes so high that they would give a mountain goat a nosebleed.

When the bailout is put in personal terms, it’s obvious that Congress, the Bush Administration and Obama, aren’t using the money to stimulate the economy. They are protecting their friends and building their power base. The bailout is one great big, giant, colossal subterfuge.

The minds of Americans can be changed with reason. Any politician (of any political stripe) is invited to explain why we should care if the Fat Cats on Wall Street and those sitting in the board rooms of the Big Three can’t afford to buy a new yacht, or a third or fourth home.

WARNING: It would probably be medically unsound to hold your breath while waiting for this answer. Besides, the truth is in the silence.